So I've been slacking off on actually writing these blogposts, so now I've got 15 retrospectives to cover. Sure, I could just let it go, but for the sake of completeness, I feel like I should go through these. We'll see how long this takes.
So I haven't actually done an intro. I'll do one later, but for now, the logo page is the first thing that's in this 'album'. The picture here is just the Lilian logo/symbol. For the record, I didn't make this logo, I think I did a google image search for "Lilith Sigil", and this was the best thing that came out of the search. There was a lot of other stuff too, but this seemed to have the most potential, and it seemed easier to put on a flag.
The text is designed to set up the next few pages, and give a bit of background info on the Lilian concept, as a whole. It's more intro than anything else. This was all a total asspull, by the way. I just looked at the logo, and came up with shit for it.
The mother/maiden/crone stuff is pulled directly from wicca, and I gave it a Lilian flair, just to tie it into the overall theme. I don't really explain much here, as I have 8 or 9 whole pages to do that.
The 5 points of revolution were loosely based on the 5 pillars of Islam. You can see the Shahada in "Fealty", Salat in "Sexual Worship", Zakat in "Femdom", and Pilgrimage in "Nature Protection". Temple Building was just something I tossed in to fill things out, which is why the page for it is so out there.
The Triple-Goddess intro page features a picture that I ended up finding after making the page. The original picture had 2 mothers and 1 crone. This one has all 3 archetypes represented, and they're conveniently placed from left, to right. I can't really have asked for a better pic, honestly. I'm glad that the crone here isn't drawn as being particularly ugly.
The text here basically just explains what the 3 archetypes are, and gives a tiny bit of information about where I'm going with the explanations on the next pages. Of particular note is the crone description, which is substantially longer than the others. This was done to imply, somewhat subtly, that the crones are the ones who wrote the pamphlet, and so they're giving themselves top billing.
The maiden page picture is a bit odd, in that it depicts a somewhat odd sexual act. Yes, they're having normal missionary sex, but the position is the only normal thing about this picture. The boy's dressed up like a girl, and he's got a 'tail' buttplug crammed up his ass. There's a strapon on the bed, so clearly, these two have been experimenting with different sex acts.
The woman acts as a bit of a foil to the boy in this scene, she's of a different ethnicity, which is nice for variety, but more importantly, there's nothing really going on with her. She's not wearing leather, or any sort of embellishments, aside from (possibly) her regular makeup. He's all dolled up, but she isn't which presents a more "femdommy" image, overall.
The text here expands on the ideas presented in the block intro. I like the phrase, "gushed forth, in a flood of passion". I thought it was a clever little play on words. I wish that the last sentence in the second paragraph had been more about the sexual creativity, and less about the just sexual nature of the maidens. Oh well.
My "Tiein" with Lilith here, is somewhat strong. I like the phrasing in the second paragraph of the tiein. It implies that other deities (Jehovah) don't actually love their followers, which is a common theme in the Lilian theological narrative.
The mother page picture is nice, because it features the "2 moms" Lilian ideal. The boy's dick looks a little weird, but hey, who's looking there, right? I like that the darker haired lady has her ass in full view, and it's neat that she's so involved in the scene. Overall, it's a nice picture, that works well with the text. These two women are teaching their son about sex toys. A good picture.
The text here ended up being chopped up into two different ideas, which probably wasn't the best thing, because it required me to devote 4 paragraphs to 4 topics, instead of 2 for 2. The result was that I couldn't really talk about any of them in detail.
The nurturing bit for the mother, honestly, isn't the best written, given the context of the pamphlet. This is supposed to be for convert boys, who would presumably be over the age of 6, and I'm here talking about early childhood sex education. Shit that doesn't concern them, in any way. So that sucked. The Tiein for the nurturing, I liked, simply because I was able to use the phrase, "The Jehovan Menace". It's a lot of fun writing like that.
The protection bit for the mother is simple and straightforward, but also very short. I did like using the phrase, "whisperings of Jehovah". That's straight out of Islamic culture, by the way. It's usually "the whisperings of satan/iblis". The tiein paragraph is again, simple, but nice, and it gets the job done.
The last paragraph is a bit of a throwaway. I just tossed it in there because I had some extra space, but I feel like it's reasonably well written. Also, apparently, good mothers take a special interest in their boys, in the Lilian faith. I guess that makes sense to canonize, since I sure as shit haven't been mentioning the girls in all of this.
The crone page picture is one that I had saved up, along with some 8 or 9 other gilfpics, for a rainy day. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with them, but I figured they'd come in handy, and they're rare enough to want to save, when you find a good one. Funny little aside, the poster (that I partially cut off for space) is actually a different /ss/ pic by the artist.
The text here is a bit stilted in the beginning, which sucks, but I think it gets a little better as the page goes on. The text almost reads like an advertisement for older women in the Temple, which is how its supposed to read. The pamphlet was written by crones, so naturally, they would use their page to give themselves a bit of an edge over the competition. Lord knows they'd need it. You ever seen old hippy women? Naked?
The tiein text is much shorter than the others, and is more of a throwaway than the others, as well. It's clear that this page is more about getting boys interested in the "mature" women than actually teaching them anything. As such, the tiein text is mostly just about the benefits of maturity.
The fealty page picture is a bit odd. I really wasn't sure what I could use that would represent fealty to Lilith. A shota licking a brown lady with white hair? A shota licking his mom? Just straight up fucking? After I wrote the page, I ended up choosing this picture, which is more suggestive, than anything else. I like it, but I still feel like there was probably a better picture out there, somewhere.
The text for this page was also difficult. I ended up just making it about general piety, and tying that concept in with a fantasy of fucking a nun, as she teaches you about Lilith. Not much more to say about this one, other than, it was tough to write, and hopefully it came out decent.
The sexual worship page picture was pretty straightforward. Really, anything could work, including a mutual or even solo masturbation picture. I decided to settle on this one, because the boy looks like a mormon missionary, and the lady has a hairy pussy. That's really it. He's supposed to be an acolyte on an outcall, by the way.
The text here reiterates some of the previously stated (in other pamphlets) ideas about Lilith's power coming from sex, and features a bit of good old fashioned Jehovah bashing, as well. I enjoyed putting in some of the alternative 'rituals'. I've been meaning to put the whole "jerking off while pointing towards some Lilian landmark" idea somewhere, but I hadn't found a good place, before this. It really is a fun idea, even if I turn it into a joke, here.
The second half of the text is basically just an ad for the Acolyte program, because the Lilians never miss an opportunity to push that program on their boys.
The nature protection page picture is different from the others, in that it uses old style artwork, and that it doesn't really show anything. These kids are just naked, and kissing. There's actually nothing implicitly sexual about that. There are plenty of old ladies with pictures/statues of 2 naked kids kissing, and nobody gives it a second thought. There were other, more explicit, pictures that I could have used, but this one had a certain 'magic' to it. I think it's the flower frame, and the little wreaths on their heads. It's a really cute pic.
Much like the picture, the text here isn't amazingly sexual. It's mostly 'revolution' stuff, and only gets to the sex near the end. Even then, though, there's no real explicit anything. I've been told that this is fine, but it still bothers me, somewhat.
The femdom page picture is one that I may or may not have used before, I'm not totally sure. It looks familiar, but I don't know. Usually, I'm good at working out whether I've used something before. Anyway, I like this picture. Yes, the woman is kind of large, and her nose is not particularly flattering from below, but it is a nice view, and the hand holding adds to the picture's appeal. The woman is also attractively dressed.
The text for this was a lot of fun to write. It reads like the people writing it were trying to convince themselves, more than the reader. Especially the "OUR SLAVES LOVE US!!!!!111" bit. I actually went through a couple of rewrites for this page, mostly cutting content, that wouldn't fit. The 'femdom is what men really want' bit is from the rewrite.
The second 'block' of this page is about how only Lilian women are supposed to be obeyed. This, honestly, could have been only a couple of sentences, and maybe it should have been only a couple of sentences. But, you know, it was a lot of fun writing the bit about how boys should lie to the police if they ask where their priestesses touch them. It says a lot about your organization if you have to straight up train people to lie to the cops in your intro classes. I kind of wish I had made the word "revolutionary" italicized, or in red, or something.
The conclusion for this page is relatively straightforward. I do, however, really like the bit about 'intense, spiritual pleasure'. I've heard people talk about Islamic prayer this way, and it's something that I wanted to put into the Lilian idea. It sounded nice when they said it.
Christ, the picture for the Temple Building page. I really wanted this to have a pornographic picture, and I really wanted to make the 'Temple Structure' page a different page. I'm not sure why that didn't happen, but it didn't happen. At any rate, this was basically just a table made in Libre Writer, screenshot, and then placed into GIMP. I have no clue whether those percentages make sense.
The text here started off as a basic, regular, discussion about Temple Building, and why it's important 'for the revolution', but ended up becoming something totally different. I'm still not sure whether I like this page, or not.
Honestly, the idea that Lilians are more likely to compartmentalize into small groups, isn't particularly insane. It actually makes much more sense than the gigantic police target that something like the Eugene or San Francisco Temple would be.
Realistically, there's no way in hell that you would be able to bribe enough public officials to allow a massive, international, child sex and prostitution ring to exist. There's no way that you'd be able to distribute monthly magazines, for that ring, without somebody finding one. You wouldn't be able to sell them, either. Not in the 70's, not in the 80's, not in the liberal havens of Eugene and San Fran, not anywhere, and not ever. This would never be acceptable, to anyone, and there's no way that it could remain a secret, for long. Kids just don't work that way. People don't work that way.
At best, they could pretend to be really hardcore feminist nudists, and possibly be left alone that way, but the second somebody came across a single copy of "Bounty of Lilith", the game would be up. So there's definitely an argument to made for "why make any of this realistic, if it's inherently unrealistic?"
Anyway, the entire structure of the Lilians is pulled, almost directly, from the Ba'ath Party. I changed around a couple of names, to give them a Lilian flair, and fiddled with the numbers a bit, but otherwise, it's just Ba'ath.
The first 'norape' page picture is pulled from a set that I often use when I'm trying to portray 'bad ideas'. I don't know off the top of my head who made it, but it's very useful for this purpose. The boy actually starts sobbing in the later pictures. It's played for laughs, I think, but honestly, how funny is that?
The text here answers some questions that were asked on 8chan, about who the kids were required to fuck. The answer is somewhat interesting. In a lot of my earlier work, I made it seem like either the boys were total fucking machines, or that they didn't really have a choice in who they fucked. This is because I was writing propaganda, and covering the issue of rape in the Temple is difficult in propaganda. It was touched on, a bit, in some of the internal documents, but not so much in the magazines.
This pamphlet seemed like the most logical place to put it.
The second 'norape' page tackles one of the more obvious issues of the Lilians. They're so past the line of "child abuse", that the line is, most likely, a dot, to them. So where do they draw the line? Well, this page seeks to explain it.
Yes, I went off pattern there. The picture for this page is essentially just the nicest cuddlepic that I had laying around, that I hadn't used previously. Strangely enough, cuddlepics are kind of difficult to find. There's tons out there, but most of the boorus focus on explicit pictures, so you won't find them there. Most of the ones that I have come from a single night of going through pixiv's oneeshota tag with the family filter turned on.
The text here, as stated, seeks to explain exactly where 'the line' is for Lilians. I like that I was able to use the "Arrogant Father" phrase again, I like that term. I also like that I was able to frame 'child abuse' in a more "Lilian" way. Really, they'd need their own word for child abuse, if only to keep the kids from looking up the real definition of the term, and getting ideas.
So, "Counter-Revolution". I do wonder if I laid it on a bit too thick with this, but I'm not rewriting it, so whatever. The specific acts are basically just the first few things that popped into my head, when I thought of sexual child abuse, with a couple, like the "contact with men/contact below 4" existing just to show the age ranges that the Lilians find acceptable.
An important thing to note is the repeated use of the word, "Forcible", or "Forced". That actually gives a lot of leeway for men, nepiphilic mothers, and all sorts of other people, to do whatever they want, if, they can convince the kid to go along with it. Being the adults, that of course, would be easy. Kids want to please adults, for the most part, and they'll do some pretty insane shit, if a beloved and trusted adult tells them to.
Next up is the Exhibition block intro. The picture for this one is just one of the few '/ss/ exhibition' pics that I haven't used. There aren't really that many, and this one looks decent, so I used it. It uses established characters, which dates it, but oh well.
The text here essentially serves two purposes. It presents the fantasy of exhibition and mutual masturbation in the Lilian setting, and it also gives story content, expanding the 'Temple Library' idea that was discussed briefly in the Nun Lifestyle pamphlet.
The first few paragraphs explain what the Temple Library is, before moving onto a discussion of the exhibition game, itself. Really, this entire page is just a setup for the question/answer of the next few pages, explaining the terms used, and giving the framework necessary for those pages to make sense.
The scenario page's picture isn't actually /ss/ at all. If you look hard, you can see the old men on the sides of this woman. I just liked the picture, and I felt like it represented 'exhibitionism' quite well.
The text for this page was incredibly fun to write. It's basically just 3 exhibition/voyeurism fantasies, with an /ss/ slant to them. I remember having these sorts of 'discussions' in the pullout programs at school, except the questions were about what to do when your buddy tries to get you on the corner selling dope with him. Turning that format into a sexual thing was a lot of fun, and the rest of the pamphlet will most likely end up being along these lines. They're an interesting writing exercise.
Many of these scenarios were inspired by JOI's, but some of them were inspired by things like "Ring360", and its assorted side projects. I feel like they capture the feeling of those fantasies reasonably well. They're not perfect, but nothing is. I think they get the job done, though. I enjoyed describing the outfits of the ladies, and I feel like this paints a good picture in the mind of the reader.
The questions were a bit difficult to phrase in a way that wouldn't make them painfully obvious, but I feel like I did an okay job with that. Writing these sorts of things is a unique challenge, but in the end, you get a unique product, that (hopefully) ends up being a lot of fun to read.
The answers page picture was just another exhibitionism pic, this time with a better focus on /ss/. I like it a lot, and I like most everything from this artist. I feel like it gels reasonably well with the content. She's sitting in a chair, and flashing a boy. That's basically what we're talking about. It's a good pic.
The text here was fun to write, although I may have gone off track in a couple places.
Scenario 1's answer, honestly, reads like it was written for a specific boy. The bits about "not in front of her" are a bit telling. They wouldn't say it, if nobody had ever done it, right? The bit about the clothing not signalling anything probably could have been cut for space, but eh, whatever.
Scenario 2's answer is a bit better, if short. I just noticed that I never really explain what a 'designated area' actually is, but I guess it would be different for each Temple Library, so there's no real way to explain it.
Scenario 3's answer is a bit light on actual discussion, but I guess there's not much to say, either. She's being provocative, and telling you to come fuck her. So fuck her, right? What else is there to say?
I focused quite a bit in this block, and particularly on this page, on the concept of being allowed to say no. I may have overdone it, a bit, but, as usual, I'm not rewriting it. I'll just remember, for next time, to say it once, and move on.
So that's this half of the Temple Intro pamphlet. I'm not sure how many pages of this I'm going to do. I'm thinking that I'll do an 'Orgy Etiquette' block, in the same vein as the 'Exhibition Game' block, and possibly a 'Sex with High Priestess' block, too, again, in the 'scenario' style, but beyond that, I'm not sure what else I need, in this pamphlet. I guess I could discuss prayer, a bit more, but first, I'd have to actually think about it, and work out exactly what to say about it.
I'm also considering another 'mom/son guide' pamphlet, along the same lines as the "Mommy Bubble" pamphlet, but essentially with the opposite advice, and it'll use one of PinkNoise's black/white sets, so it'll be from the 70's/80's. Essentially, the idea will be to show that the ideas regarding adolescent males, and their relationship to their mothers, have changed over the years.
In the pipe is a possible 'bring your little brother into the temple' pamphlet, using one of Juan Gotoh's old CG sets. I haven't given that one much thought, yet, but I'm trying to figure out if I could do it in a way that isn't just a straight restatement of the entire "Timid Boys" pamphlet.